New Year! *
Did you make some resolutions at New Year?
And? How long did you stick with them?
If you are like I used to be, you probably managed for a week or two. Maybe three weeks at the most. And then it got too hard to keep up with them, something else came up, you lost momentum, you broke them and gave up after that, because what was the use?
No surprise there. Most of those New Year resolutions are simply too big to keep up with: No more chocolate, ever! I’m going to stop smoking cold turkey! I’ll diet until I lose 30 pounds! I’ll clear my desk every single day! And so on and so forth.
And with luck, you can do it for a whole week. That is natural and normal. These goals are way too big. They have a certain “do or break”-element. They need high levels of discipline, willpower and denying one’s own desires. Nobody can keep doing this for a long period of time.
However, if you do want to change something in your life, choose small steps. Give yourself time to sneak up on the big change by getting there gradually. Maybe you can learn to put away your chocolate after a few pieces. (Actually, you could tap for that.) Or you could set a firm number of cigarettes you smoke per day, and go lower week after week. Diets have never really worked for long-term weight loss. So maybe you could go for small changes, let go of some high-calorie foods and add more vegetables to your diet. Do whatever works for you and takes you in the right direction.
Let’s tap for any resistance about this:
KP: Even though I am ashamed for not managing to stick to my resolutions for longer, I’m okay the way I am and open to the possibility that I might be able to change these things in small steps.
Even though I’m annoyed with myself that I have given up on my New Year resolutions already, because they just don’t work for me, I’m okay the way I am and open to the possibility that I can still change what I want and need to change.
Even though I feel bad about forgetting my New Year resolutions already, I’m okay the way I am and open to the possibility that I can still reach my goals in better ways.
IE: I’m so ashamed of myself!
OE: I’m so annoyed with myself!
UE: I’ve broken all my New Year resolutions already!
UN: And it’s only February.
CP: Darn, I never manage to keep them.
CB: I must be a bad person.
UA: My resolutions don’t even last three weeks!
AW: I really am a loser.
Take a deep breath!
IE: I’m sooooo annoyed with myself.
OE: Once again, I didn’t manage to keep even one single resolution.
UE: And that makes me angry!
UN: I’m so disappointed about myself.
CP: If only I had more willpower!
CB: But maybe it’s not really my fault?
UA: Maybe those resolutions simply didn’t fit?
AW: Maybe I was just trying too hard.
Take a deep breath!
IE: I’m going to take a good look at my New Year resolutions.
OE: And then I’m going to take good care of myself.
UE: And choose something that fits me better.
UN: I’ll make a small, managable resolution.
CP: Maybe I can eat a little less chocolate.
CB: Maybe I can smoke a little less.
UA: Maybe I can eat a little more veggies.
AW: I’ll change just a little bit and won’t try to jump 100 feet in one go.
Take a deep breath!
IE: I choose to find a gentle way for eating less chocolate.
OE: I choose to make it easy for myself to smoke less.
UE: I choose to discover recepies that make it fun for me to eat better.
UN: And that feels a lot more doable.
CP: I choose to change a little bit every week.
CB: Without a huge exercise of willpower.
UA: And I can even tap for those things!
AW: This feels much better already.
Take a deep breath!
Of course, changing habits still requires some determination. Now that you don’t have to fight yourself all the way, however, you have the energy to become creative and find fun solutions for changing part of your life. Only you can determine the right steps. Just make sure they feel good for you, and contain only a small challenge. If you are willing to treat yourself well, get creative and change little things by small steps – you’ll be surprised at how far you’ll get by the end of the year.
Hurrah for change!
* Image courtesy of Grant Cochrane / FreeDigitalPhotos.net