Sometimes, when things don’t go as you want them, or when people criticize you, the natural reaction is to contract and play small. We give in, we apologize, we hope this situation will go away somehow.
And that makes us lose our power.
It feels safer than staying tall and strong.
Playing small is what we are used to. For a long time in our lives – in fact, for most of our forming years – we were small. We had less power than our parents, we were forced to obey and do what they wanted. So we learned to deal with that by stuffing our emotions away, by ducking our heads and by doing what others wanted.
It’s normal. It’s safe. It’s what we are used to.
And it keeps us small.
There is only one way out of playing small: Standing tall.
This can be difficult, because it goes against our learned response, especially when we’re up against critcism or outspoken opposition. Yet every day there are small situations where we choose to do something – and we could start choosing to stand in our power.
Here’s an example: The other day I came home from traveling. I stood outside the airport, luggage at my side, being very tired from a long flight. I had two choices for getting home: Right there, waiting for me to jump in, was a shuttle that would take me directly to my home. But it was clearly more expensive than the shuttle I usually take to the train station of my town where I normally get a taxi to take me home.
I made the decision from where I want to be, from my power: I chose to honor myself and my exhaustion and took the expensive shuttle home.
That was an easy one, right?
Well, you can find such easy decisions in your life every day and start to make them from your position of power. Ask yourself this question: What would be the best for me if I really honor myself?
And then make the choice. And learn – one choice at the time – to stand in your power.
Here’s some tapping to help get you started on taking that power:
Even though I learned to play it safe and avoid choices, I’m okay the way I am and I now choose to learn to stand in my power.
Even though it feels so much safer to play it small and avoid decisions and confrontations, I’m okay the way I am and I now choose to learn to grow into my power.
Even though I’m scared of standing in my power, it’s so unfamiliar, I’m okay the way I am and I now choose to learn to do so with courage and grace.
So, what’s the next decision you have to face, and how will you choose? Share in the comments!
(Don’t know what to do with those sentences? Check out how EFT works here – with video.)
Image source: F. Moebius
PS: If you want more help standing in your power, let’s connect and decide how I can support you best in this. I work internationally through Skype. Just click here and drop me an email.